pretty on the inside (stargrrl911) wrote,
pretty on the inside
stargrrl911

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28 days 6 hours 42 minutes 12 seconds..

here s to some donnie darko goodness...

night before last i had the oddest dream. from which i was rudely awoken.

I was in a white van, like a work van, no seats in the back, with E sitting on the floor across from me, and i believe K was driving. he started apologizing for something, and i think he was either teary eyed, or he was crying just a little bit, then he started telling me something, and i couldnt hear him, due to people talking and traffic noise. just all these voices and noise to drown out his words. i kept repeating 'erron, i cant hear you, i cant hear you.' and he just kept talking. about a minute later, it clicked that i couldnt hear him, and he started to repeat his words, and at the moment, the phone rang, and i woke up. i was pissed. thats an understatment there.

i havent a clue what it was supposed to mean, and k was trying to help me figure it out, and people kept coming in the room, and interrupting, to which he laughed, and said 'that there is irony'. cant hear e in my dream, cant hear k talk to me.

wating on robert to get here so i can go get my haircut. grr. i called over there, his mom wasnt that happy, or according to him she made some sort of face, and his cousin and friend were in the room and all i could hear from them was 'i love you...oooh, robs in love' and 'how old is she'..blah blah blah. i got to put a stop to that shit. a stop to everything.

fuck some valentines day which is right around the corner. i hate it. last year i got drunk at dinner with bobby, then went and blew a bunch of money shopping. ha. this year, im going to buy some beer, and get fucking wasted. fuck some flying cupid bullshit. haha.

my brother is back in town. word. maybe i can actually hang out with him today. that d be nice, havent seen him since christmas.

not too too much more going on. got some money issue im going to be stressing about tomorrow, but im hoping i can get it taken care of. word. we shall see about that. have to go to my parents house tonight, hopefully, and have a talk with them. so much on my plate right now, and im not even trying to stress it. ive had people tell me they admire me, cause i never stress the things that are to come in the future, i just deal with today. thing is i do stress them in my own way, and im sure things would be better for me if i did take the future in more consideration. ah fuck it. too late now.

i guess thats it for now. all good things to you all.

* i think its kinda funny
and i think its kinda sad
but the dreams in which im dying, are the best ive ever had*
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